Posted by
CharmPoiseAndPersonality on Tuesday, August 01, 2006 5:04:41 PM
As an old-fashioned girl who doesn't cohabitate with her husband-to-be (but who always tries to look pretty for him when he returns from work), who has no tattoos (visible or otherwise), and who has read the vitriol in the writings of Betty Friedan and respectfully disagrees, I am saddened by the lack of good manners in the world. I don't know where it began--was it with the bra-burning hippie generation?
I tend to blame all the society's ills on my parents' generation--thank heaven my own parents were too busy going fraternity dances to worry about being part of that dirty and depressing '60s counterculture. Still, I've always been fascinated by the hippies. It's probably because, as the sort of girl who traipses through life in a demure pair of kitten heels, I am, ironically, a bit counterculture myself. We do live in the age of bare midriffs, careless profanity, and rampant illegitimacy, after all. As a girl who doesn't drop f-bombs, has no out-of-wedlock babies, and actually wears classic clothing, some days I feel like the last of a dieing breed.
It may sound naive, but I happen to believe that hatred starts with bad manners. The basis of good breeding is treating everyone equally--everyone from the janitor to the senator. It is for that reason that I believe Mel Gibson has acted very disgracefully by making disrespectful comments about Jewish people. We all know that his father was an anti-Semite, so I suppose he was never taught to respect all people--which, more than knowing which fork to use when, is the basis of good manners. Of course, that's not really an excuse, but it does offer a different perspective.
No one talks about manners anymore; it seems no one cares about them. I thought it was horribly rude last week when members of Congress criticized the newly-elected president if Iraq, a guest in our country, as if he were their political opponent. As an American who cares about people's feelings, I wanted to apologize on behalf of Congress for treating a guest in our country with such disrespect.
It also seems that members of political parties don't treat each other with any kind of regard. They make venemous attacks, then demand apologies (what good is an apology if someone has to demand it?). I know much of it is the political game--and it isn't pretty--but it saddens me that people can't be more kind to one another. Just once I'd like to see a Democrat asknowledge that President Bush is a nice person and a decent human being, instead of treating him as a war criminal (and believing he actually is).
It seems to me we've reached the point that simple kindness is as quaint a notion as a girl taking piano lessons when all the other 6-year-olds are all tarted up in lycra spandex, doing a Britney dance. I equate good manners with basic kindness, and I suppose that, much like not cursing indescriminately or not baring one's midriff, kindness is a personal choice. It's one I wish more people would make.